A Jesuit Goodbye

8 formal years of Ateneo education plus almost 5 years of directly working for the Jesuits has allowed me to accumulate a number of Jesuit friends all over the country. Since I have been based in Manila for over 3 years now, most of them are also based here in the Metro (more specifically based in Katipunan).

One of them (and to a huge to extent a favorite Jesuit friend) is Fr. Mario Francisco, SJ. Our great friendship started when I joined the Jesuit Volunteers Philippines (JVP). He was the National Chaplain during my service year in 2001-2002.

Back then however, I just knew him as that Jesuit who gave recollections not only with passion but with style. (no JVPs, I don’t mean the famous shortsJ ) I’ll never forget the Orsem line – "Handa ka na bang Paligaw sa Kanya?" The use of videos and songs (and not your usual Bukas Palad, Hangad songs ha, R.E.M!) gave a different meaning to reflection. He was also that cool priest who danced in parties during seminars. He had a signature move I so wish I can show you. Lastly, he was also that chaplain who sunbathed and swam a lot.

SEMINARS --- Our friendship deepened when I started working for the JVP central office in 2003. Perhaps because I was the "crazy, gaga" program officer (compared to my partner in crime TQ who is to an extent gaga herself but not as crazy as I am) Fr. Mario and I, along with frustrated Showbiz personality-formation staff Jope and sometimes with JVP resident Campus Minister Diva Chris, partnered in "scheming" for the daily masses and formation staff presentations. Sometimes during plenary sessions, we would totally be "pasaways" and hold crazy conversations that would make us laugh loud enough for the other formation staff to remind us to be quiet.

FOOT SPA --- For someone who is a sosyalito, I couldn’t believe that last Summer, when I decided that my late birthday gift to Fr. Mario will be a date in the foot spa, was his first foot spa ever! It was funny to watch him pay close attention to what the lady was doing to his feet. It was even more funny when the lady realized that it was his first time, she commented "Ah Father, kaya pala ang kapal nung sinuscrub ko." Father suggested to the spa manager to also place magazines which cater to male clients. Makes me think he had plans of coming back to the place. (that afternoon was just so much fun!)

FREE STUFF --- lunch at Sentro, Unlimited use of EAPI conference room/s, food anytime at EAPI, LCD projector, Punta Fuego, lechon and tequila for parties – those were just some of the free stuff we/I got from him. His wide connections made things easier for us in the JVP. One can also easily get free consultations on Spirituality, Family and Lovelife with Fr. Mario. Just don’t expect a cheesy, counselor reply from him though. I once got an "Ingat ka Beauty" reply from him after pouring out my anger and feelings of hurt toward God. Inis noh!? But it made me think God might just be saying the same. Simply teasing me and allowing me to just pour it all out knowing one day soon I’ll understand. Be careful too with what you share to Father. He’s not very good at keeping secrets, trust me!.. (Speaking of free stuff) Yes, I’m still waiting for that long overdue book which was supposed to be his Christmas present to me last year.

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I was in Ateneo yesterday afternoon for an important meeting for a video documentary when I realized he was leaving the day after (which is today). Yes we threw him a despedida a week before (which lacked so much planning by the way, and I totally place all the blame in my current job) but it didn’t sink in that much then. So I sent him a final goodbye text. And after 4 years of friendship I finally got that cheesy "goodbye-will miss you" reply from him. (Which I don’t intend to delete, so I have something to tease him with when gets back.hehehe)

I realized however that saying goodbye to a Jesuit friend (volunteer, scholastic, novice or priest) is not as sad and as tear-filled as bidding goodbye to other friends - it’s a Jesuit goodbye, bitter sweet I believe. Because in as much as you are sad that he is leaving, you know and you are sure that his leaving is a necessary departure. That he has to go because it’s essential to fulfilling his mission as a servant of God. And you also know and you are also sure that he will come back. And when he comes back, despite some (major) changes, you know that he will still be that same person you can talk to, fool around with, dance with and pray with.

Despite being in the same campus, I didn’t even decide to pay Fr. Mario a last visit to give him a last hug. The text was fine, the party last week enough. He can go; we will just wait for his return.

(written-September 7,2005)